Kenny Casanova

Hey herbs....

2007-10-30T22:05:34Z

I haven't been on here forever.

Had a cool Halloween party at Sweet Pete's.

Ok I'm gonna jet now.

Check out creamyrim.com

Car towed? Not for long.

2007-05-21T14:04:42Z

So ... I go down to this cool little bar called the Red Square in Albany. It's a fun kinda gothy place sometimes. I dressed in lots of blacks and a Batman logo shirt and was ready to listen to some NIN and old school rap (which those gothers dig there- IDK why.) I tried to goth it up as much as The Casanova could and it wasnt bad, but I refused to wear eye liner -you know?

Twenty minutes in, I was bored -not really my scene. Decided to go. I go out to my car - OR WHERE MY CAR WAS SUPPOSED TO BE - and it was gone.

I was ticked. I seriously went out of my way to park somewhere where I wouldn't get towed. I parked right under a sign on a building that said PUBLIC PARKING! "It's gone?! How can this be so?!" I thought.

I seriously wanted to kill someone.

At about this time a cop came by, I flagged him down and learned that the sign was actually for the space BEHIND where the sign is - not the lot where it hung. Deceiving right?

The cop agreed and then informed me that I would have to take a cab to where my car was.

"OK - I have about enough money for that," I said to the policeman, "but not to get the car out. I am going to try and devise away to just take it without having to pay," I boasted, not really sure I could or if I couldn't. "They should have taken that sign down."

"Well, It's not a city-tow, but I wouldn't steal your car back if I were you. I guess the towers could get you for trespassing or something. I know you feel cheated because of the sign, but I don't know about just stealing it back."

"Well - He stole my car first - so I am hoping I can steal it back."

The cop shook his head and drove off, not engaging in my angry crime-breaking bluffs.

On the ride over, I told the desheveled cabbie what was up and being someone who sometimes makes his living off of idiots like me he said, "Well - it is still private property, and they have every right. How would you like it if someone pared in your driveway. But that sucks about the sign. I can see why you would be mad. But again - hey, they still have a right."

The bastard. Who asked him?

As we pulled onto the road, I saw the lot. I made the cabbie back up as he started to park infront of the tow service lot. I then informed him of my plan.

"Back up a little more man. I don't want them to see me." I smirked. "I AM GOING TO TRY MY BEST TO STEAL BACK MY CAR."

He said, "Ok, whatever. Fare is still eight bucks."

I spotted him a ten'er and made him back up to the main street so I would not be seen by the evil car-towers.

Sporting my feeble attempt at a goth outfit, I surveyed the situation in the dark like Batman himself. I lurked up and down the street hosting the towing place, staying across from it and much in the dark. Eventually, as I was unnoticed and eye-level with the destination, I leared into the dragon's lair.

It was a dungeon of sad imprisoned vehicles. At its threshold stood an old white trash looking guy manning his post, with three teeth in his whole head - two of them rotten. He stood in the side doorway of a cashier's shack that resembled a subway teller's ticket booth. However, the toothless avenger made a midnight mistake; the gate to a lot of repo'ed cars was open and unchained.

So I waited...
Like a cheetah for a kill...

Then...
At the right moment...

Slowly... Slowly I crept.
Step by step...
Inch by inch...

It wasn't all that long before the opportunity presented itself. The man turned and went to a phone call in the building. I could see him do something on a computer screen that was probably like getting directions for another stake. With his attention of the lot, I struck.

I sprinted into the lot full speed like cheetah in heat macking after some fine looking kitty. (I was conveniently in all black, mind you. In Kenny Casanova Goth Gear, you can hide pretty well. The trashman never saw me coming.)

I hoped in my car and did NOT turn on the lights. I then flew out of there like The Dukes of Hazard.

Of course they probably have my plate number and quite possibly a video of me taking back my ride. But, I have a picture of the sign I parked at in my cellphone- so if they want to fight it- I say "bring it on."

My guess is they won't bother though.

I think that the loser who was on shift probably was not the owner, seeing how he was working at like 2:AM. I bet he threw the paperwork away on my car. If Yuck-Mouth is even a little bit smart, it would be better to forget that they ever towed my vehicle, then to tell his boss that he was too lazy to protect the lot the right way.

Was I wrong to do this? No silly. There is no honor among theives.

Either way... It it was nice to win at least for one night for all the people who have been towed.

Score up another victory for the bad guys!
Boo ya!

Senior Photograph

2007-03-05T18:17:57Z

Thinking about you sets the center of my soul on fire
your eyes
your face
flush out all other pictures safe deep in my mind.

A warm glow then takes over my whole body
my spirit
my heart
all burn on the light that you have shown them.

It turns cold inside when you are away
an hour
a moment
My life is astray without your face.

Life softly stings sometimes.
one random morning
one random night
a dying fire dwindles and sadly the spark softens

In coldness, so much pain, so much sorrow
living a lifeless life
drowning, crowding
horror floods each path I follow

Incased in ice, my heart slows
sluggish
solid
I can barely move

And when if feels like it can't get colder
one glow
one coal
sparks up again and burns for another day

It has barely been one day away.
... I just looked at your smile again and the fire returns.

Author anonymous

Martini Glass Gone

2007-03-05T18:16:41Z

First night of laughter softens the soul and wets the lips.
Holding hands. Jazz bands.
Martini glass gone in just six more sips.

Flashback to fate on the first date's glimpse.
Awkward glance. Snowball romance.
Martini glass gone in just four more sips.

Soft hair sweeps my cheek and tickles and flips.
Speak to an ear. Warm breath shared.
Martini glass gone in just two more sips.

Holding you close, as our souls eclipse.
Softy I kiss you. You kiss me too.
A new glass before us... and each of us sips.

-Author anonymous

k9casanova @ 2006-12-15T11:53:00

2006-12-15T16:53:36Z

So I am drinking this SoBe "Lizard Lava" Strawberry Daiquiri that I got from the vending machine. Its really good - but I looked and it has ALOE VERA in it.

Isn't that like in hand cream?

DAMN.

Im going to have some REALLY smooth insides later.

A new yummy idea

2006-12-15T13:44:37Z

As many of you know - I eat TONS of tyson chicken patties of the white meat persuation. Well, anyhow, I came up with a tasty new idea...\

Take a piece of pizza, cut it in half and put the chicken patty in the middle -using the pizza as the bread of a sammich.

You have an instant chicken parm club and MAN ALIVE!

It is delicious.

Went to Japan

2006-11-19T00:51:32Z

BlogThis! Bevan in Japan!

Kenneth G. Bevan of Troy, NY (KAYFABE MY LAST NAME YO!) an English teacher at the Capital Region Career & Technical School in Colonie,NY was selected by the Japan Fulbright Memorial Fund Teacher Program to travel to Japan, fully funded by the group, in October 2006 and study that nation's educational system and culture. Bevan was selected from a national pool of 2,300 applicants and was among 200 educators making the trip to Japan in October.

Here is the blog link I used...
kennethgbevan.blogspot.com

BOB SAGET

2006-03-06T12:01:54Z

I heard from like 600 sources that due to the actions of the fans of Rob "Not so" Feinstein -the GWF show was canceled. Therefore I went and purchased BOB SAGET tickets. (I know - WTF?) It turns out I was wrong, but already had the tickets and a wife who wanted to go. I checked around to see what was up and people told me that most of the wrestlers had canceled on the GWF show as well -so I figured it would be canceled. -But, I guess not.

Anyhow - first off, I could not believe how many people went to see BOB SAGET. Skidmore college was packed; standing room only. It was said there was a thousand seats on the floor and then the rafters were full too. It was also funny to see the Saget-Marks all over the place. They had signs, banners and home-made WE LOVE SAGET T-shirts. It was UNREAL.

Next, Bob Saget was filthy. He was not the family TV guy that you remember from FULL HOSE and AMERICA'S FUNNIEST VIDEOS. He asked wackos in the crowd if they shaved their junk and all sorts of weird shocking crap.

He was funny as hell, because you just can't picture that wholesome guy being so blue. He finished with a Backstreet Boys song - I WANT IT THAT WAY - playing guitar but changing the words to "Danny Tanner Was Not Gay." One of the lines I remember went something like "Kimmy Gibler had an innocent smile, but people didn't know I *@4%'ed her doggy style. Danny Tanner is not gay."

Eddie Guerrero is still alive?!

2006-02-20T16:52:48Z

IS EDDIE GUERRERO STILL ALIVE?
By Kenny Casanova from www.KennyCasanova.com
k9casanova@aol.com

Ok… Now some people will want to beat me for saying this, but I find myself thinking something that isn’t appropriate in any light. However, it feels like WWE is booking an angle that doesn’t seem possible and yet I have found myself asking the same silly question whenever I turn on WWE. …Is Eddie Guerrero still alive?

My feeling is other people have suspected this, but no one has the pistachios to come out and say it. So here I go; Eddie Guerrero’s death could all be a big super smart angle for a return at Wrestlemania.

My brother-in-law is not a wrestling fan, but comes over to eat wings when we get PPVs. He saw some of what was going on with Rey Mysterio and wanted to know if Eddie was still alive. Whether fans want to say it or not, recent WWE storylines are making it seem like Eddie Guerrero’s death HAS BEEN BOOKED BY A PROMOTER.

Why would Vince McMahon want to go there? Why would a global megalithic corporation like WWE want to fake the death of one of its superstar performers, risking the possible backlash that would occur from worldwide media and its fans? SIMPLE… WWE figured out this formula a long time ago…Bad publicity is good publicity.

In a day when it is impossible to fool the fans due to the widely used lighting quick communication resource called the Internet, the WWE knows that “strategic leaks” are the only way you can really throw off the modern wrestling fan and subsequently create interest. Recent examples of this have shown that there is money to be made from false leaks if it is done correctly.

The Edge & Hardy scandal was amplified, exploited and leaked, then turned into a money-maker (though it was too bad Matt Hardy botched his return promo)… Chris Jericho puts up a TNA logo on his site to keep interest on him. Go back a few years and you will see other examples. Brian Pillman convinced WCW to break his contract so his crazy gimmick looked legit to anyone who might do the research (only to jump to WWF.) Vince Russo drops false rumors on the Internet to throw fans off to create more shock when storylines go the other way. Austin amplifies his hatred toward Eric Bischoff in an ECW stint to get sympathy from the crowd and to push the envelope of boss-hating.

Good wrestling promoters have a history of twisting the truth to make the most believable storylines going (i.e. Road Warrior Hawk drunk angle, Bret got screwed angle, N.W.O. and other various invasion plots etc…) The promoters even work the wrestlers to get the leaks that they want these days and visa-versa.

There is so much foreshadowing going on that makes me think WWE is planning an “Eddie Return.” I know that odds of this are slim, and that this blog will be looked at as a big conspiracy theory. I agree with you and it is wrong to say it. But it would be even more wrong if they did it. What if Eddie’s death was a work? If it is, it is the greatest and, at the same time, the rudest work of all time.

I have asked a number of people in the business what they think about this and they say all about the same thing. “You are crazy,” or “I think that would be too F’ed up,” but after I drop a few little bombs on them that have made me wonder, they have wondered too.

The last time Eddie was on television, Ken Kennedy had hit him in the head with a chair. After the match, there was a promo with Batista. His head was all bandaged up and Batista was concerned. The last words Eddie said were, “Don’t worry about me, I am going to be alright.” This footage might be revisited if this is a big rude angle.

At the Eddie Guerrero Press Conference, Vince McMahon and Chavo Guerrero seemed to me to have too much composure. At the time when I watched it, I figured to myself, “Wow, Chavo is doing such a great job.” He didn’t seem sad and I figured if it were me, I would have been bawling my eyes out. I wondered why at the time and then resolved that it must just be he knew this day would eventually come, or maybe they were not as close as he had always told everyone. I look back now and wonder if this is a work, did Chavo think it wasn’t going to work.

Either there was and still is a lot of bad taste going on, or Eddie is still alive. Vince McMahon is a bastard, but grilling Eddie’s wife Vickie, a day or so after his death on live TV?!? How does someone even approach the option? How can you ask a widow to appear on TV when her husband isn’t even in the ground yet? Does WWE have no respect for dead people and mourning? Or did Vickie just get off the phone with a clean-shaven bald-headed Eddie Guerrero who is camping out in Jamaica?

Well if Eddie is alive and hiding out, how could this secret have lasted for four months? My guess is, if this is a work, the lockerroom could still partially kayfabed to cut down possible leaks and Eddie is, in fact camping out, or maybe getting some kind of surgery somewhere and is indeed out of the public eye.

The WWE Raw & Smackdown Tribute shows seemed to contrived. While some of the wrestlers seemed very upset and concerned, others seemed like they needed to play to the camera. Now it is impossible to speculate (if this is a work) who knew and who did not know at the time of these shows. It is possible that only a tight group of people actually know the truth and might not have known the truth at the time of filming. I would suspect some (like Benoit) were informed immediately after the shooting with Eddie calling them. But even at that, Rey Mysterio did not seem moved at all. Mysterio taking off his mask seemed like the cliché “let’s make this look real” thing to do.

The tribute shows had a tinge of bullshit to them. The commentators on both shows said, “Eddie would have wanted this,” about a hundred times to validate what seemed like a moneymaker. This could be foreshadowing Vince blaming a return angle on Eddie, to keep the heat off of him in the future.

It is fact that most wrestlers have never been great actors, and the few who are have usually moved on to bigger and better the things. At the tribute shows, there was definitely a vibe of bad acting going on, which to me smells like a work. But were the wrestlers working the fans due to a future storyline, or because they felt obligated to be teary-eyed and were not?

One theory on the bad-acting vibe is if they were not in on a possible work, maybe the wrestlers thought that they should be crying, but weren’t. I can’t tell if some of the wrestlers were forcing themselves to cry because they think that is what they should do in this situation, but the tears were not turning on …It is possible that forced tears is the product of a desensitization to wrestler deaths –seeing how there have been so many. HOWEVER, forced tears could also be the product of the bad acting that goes along with another storyline.

I am sure that WWE knows how big the next-night ratings were when Pillman passed away and also Owen Hart. But they never had TWO tribute shows, due to a death in the family, nor has any death lasted as long with so much TV time and recognition as this one has.

WWE has referenced Eddie’s death NUMEROUS times every single show. It has continuously reminded the fans by armbands on Chavo (on Raw) and Rey Mysterio (on Smackdown) that Eddie Guerrero is no longer with us. Either this is a super sign of respect for the dead and the WWE has finally got it and learned that life is valuable and we should not forget, or (gulp) …it means something else, something I hate to even think of.
It means we need to remember Eddie’s death, for a big twist ending at Wrestlemania that rivals pop culture’s desire for twist endings (i.e. Fight Club & Saw). It means that WWE knows people think Tupac is still alive and have figured out how to make money off of people’s inabilities to let go of loved ones.

Eddie Guerrero’s book is ironically titled “Cheating Death.”

With a widespread headline death like this one, it seems odd that there isn’t much out there to validate it. Findagrave.com has Owen Hart’s tombstone, but there is only a picture of the cemetery that Eddie is supposed to be in. The Smoking Gun has no documents at this time, relating to his death, though documents would not necessarily prove anything anyhow. I also cannot find any evidence that a life insurance check has been cashed.

The funeral was private with only a few dozen or so family and friends. The list of people are all related to the wrestling business.

Forshadowing was light in the first few months, but now it is seemingly becoming more heavy with Benoit now joining Chavo and Mysterio using signature Eddie moves. If you watch and think about how foreshadowing could be a possibility, you will see why I am writing this right now, be it reluctant or not.

Current WWE programming has incorporated the entire Eddie Guerrero death into a storyline that is involving his wife, his best friends, and his nephew. One reason that makes me subscribe to this conspiracy theory is that these people would NOT want a part of this. Another reason I am in quandary is that I cannot understand how a writer for Smackdown can approach someone and even ask them to say “Eddie is not up there in heaven Rey, he is down there (in hell.)” With Eddie being a religious man, I would gather this would not bode well around those who loved him.

MORE FORESHADOWING… At No Way Out, they spent so much seemingly unnecessary time on Rey Mysterio when the match was over that WWE has to be planning something big. At No Way Out, Rey Mysterio lost his Wrestlemania spot to Randy Orton. He is mortified that he “let Eddie down” and lingers in the ring forever. Then he walks down a line of wrestlers in sorrow.

Rey supposedly dedicated his Royal Rumble match win to Eddie. He has now lost his Wrestlemania spot and this sets up a much-needed climax for a big finish at what WWE considers their biggest event of any year. A typical storyline in literature places a hero in must-win situation to avenge the dead, and all fingers should have been pointing at Rey to win at Wrestlemania. Now, they could still book this, with Teddy Long coming out on the next Smackdown and saying that Orton will have to now take on Rey as well in a three way at Wrestlemania, due to the fact that he held the ropes during the pin. However, another way to book this comes to mind as well.

Imagine Wrestlemania. A Rey Mysterio run-in fails and Randy Orton is beating the crap out of him in front of Vickie Guerrero (who is sitting at ringside collecting an appearance check.) Eddie out of nowhere jumps the fence, knocks out Orton. Rey looks up in disbelief. The audience is stunned. The next night on RAW… “I liiiiiied!”

It just seems likely that if Vince McMahon wanted to pick one wrestler to pull off the biggest work of all time and have him fake his death, he would pick the one whose maxim is “I Lie, I Cheat. I Steal.”

I am a wrestling manager; my ring name is Kenny Casanova. I did not know Eddie very well, but did have an opportunity to work with him on a few occasions. I hung out with him one weekend, driving him around Massachusetts for a couple of shows and he seemed like a great guy. He was constantly on the phone with his family and joking with people. He stopped in the mall to talk to a few fans. He was really down to earth. Before you blast me, keep in mind that this blog has in no way been written to disrespect him, but rather to disrespect the potential ruse that WWE might be planning.

I don’t believe in ghosts. I doubt the government is hiding information about life on other planets from us. I do not subscribe to conspiracy theories. However, this could be one of the BIGGEST ruses in history. If this is a big work, I have mixed emotions about it. I say kudos to Vince for looking at how people have subscribed to such fallacies in pop culture, such as Tupac or Elvis being still alive and figured out a way to capitalize on it. At the same time, I also think it is a work in bad taste and the trust factor would be out the window forever.

I will, however, not be shocked at Wrestlemania if an angle in wrestling were able to once again finally fool such a large population. It is slightly possible, that the Internet did not prevail this time, and the wool has been pulled over the eyes of millions. Even the smartest of all smart marks, could all be classified as gullible marks once again.

...If you would like to lift this for your site - you are more than welcome.
Kenny Casanova from www.KennyCasanova.com
k9casanova@aol.com

Kmart Strut (site archive)

2006-02-20T12:15:33Z

The Kmart Strut:
Another Bodacious Blog Entry by Kenny Casanova

On Saturday, January 28, 2006, I was sitting at home and feeling VERY hungry - perhaps the victim of a self-induced daily dose of malnutritionism. So I started calling the one person I could count on to eat like pig with me and hit the Chinese Buffet - and that was Buttery Bert Williams.

Bert like myself, pretty much has no life but also has very little money, so I had a 50/50 chance of him subscribing to the optional festivities at hand. I called him up and let him no I was craving the sensational scrumptious taste of greasy cold duck meat and General Tso's kitten. Everybody knows that it is a cardinal sin to go to buffet alone. This sin is highly frowned upon by all. I waited and crossed my fingers. Bert concurred. He was down with it!

Two make the trek complete, I added a special bonus to the night. I decided that driving a half hour out to the best buffet in the world, the shangrala of buffets "THE DRAGON BUFFET" was worth it, but the journey would be two-fold because I also wanted to purchase the new WWE Nunzio action figure. (Nunzio is pretty fresh.) He was down. We took off and hit the road. First stop... Buffet!

When we made it to the buffet; there was a line out the door and the rude people behind us stood in the frame and let the cold air in. Yes it was rude, but totally understandable. We all stood crammed in the little space that the foyer allowed, much like when a group of Roller Coaster Riders in line have been waiting under the hot sun for an hour at Six Flags. We all longed to be seated next and figured a few steps closer meant a few steps closer to pork fried rice. You see, the enticing hypnotic scents flooded our engorged nostrils with the warm and moist scrumptious aroma of broasted cat (boiled & roasted). Food was in the air. We were cold. We were dribbling. No one could help themselves as we waited to be seated. The line was nothing short of TORTURE.

During our stay, there was something that I noticed, but it went unsaid. If a child from somewhere back in the line were to move forward the crowd would look down at the child as if they were attempting to cut in line and then adjust their standing so that the no cutting would be possible. People had been waiting for some 10-15 minutes and invading their space too was like committing a cardinal sin. Another thing that I noticed was that the line consisted of all ethnicities, but seemed to be lacking people of Asian-extraction.

Looking behind me, I noticed our progress and smiled at the losers who would have to wait as our party of two stepped toward the front of the line. That is about when I noticed two Chinese people stepping to the front. "This is unfair!" I thought to myself, "If these guys get to bump the line because we are all not Chinese, you would think the would at least usher them in the side door or something." However, everyone behind me easily parted the way for them, in a total turn about of how they would not let a youngster even take a step out of line. The two Chinese guys were not to be treated as invaders of personal entitled line-space. The patrons behind me had done the math through racial profiling. It had dawned on the customers behind me, that these were not line-cutters. These were reinforcements for a very busy buffet. More employees means more yum-yums for all, so they easily had my free pass as well.

Once we made our way to the seat, in traditional buffet manner, we did not sit. We stood rudely as the waitress asked for our drink orders (water because we are a couple of cheap round-eyes) and made a mad passionate dash to the chow tables.

As Bert darted off the the region of Lo Mein and Crab Legs, my first stop rather was the Hong Kong Soup stand. Usually there is a guy there that I call "The Defender of The Duck." The way it works is that small portions of duck-meat are set aside to flavor specially made soups as you wait. For those of you who do not know, Duck is ambrosia, it is the food of the Gods (mostly becasue of its delectably greasy skin) and therefore, it is one of the most savory and EXPENSIVE foods in the whole establishment. Most people do not take large portions of the duck, as the defender casts fiery eyes at those who try. However, I was in luck. As the defender had stepped aside to work on something else, he fed me his back. I emptied the entire hot pan onto my plate in one foul fowl swoop. As I made away with my loot, the Defender Of The Duck indubitably called me "Round Eye Pig" and shook his head.

We ate like ravenous dogs. I polished away three plates of Fatty Mo' Fatty Beef Ribs, Snow Bird chicken, backed crab, Peking Style Ribs, General Sammy's Kitten and more. I am proud to say that not one vegetable besmirched my plate even once.

When we had finished, I puked like a roman into a crab carcass and called it a day. We paid the bill happily with full stomachs and made the first stop of the evening to begin the Nunzio Trek... Kmart of Colonie.

Bert said upon entering this fine establishment that he had not been in a Kmart for many many years. There were like no customers to be found and it was strangely, almost scarily silent. However, Kmart still looked the same. Very white, with gaudy red posters everywhere and very cheesy... But it was an ideal place to locate wrestling figures so we ran in silence like swift cheetahs to the toy section.

It was funny to see an item that I had marked and returned, still on the shelf some three or four months later. I pointed it out to Bert and we both laughed. But alas, I looked in sorrow at the shelf-warming action figures. NO NUNZIO.

As we turned to head back to the front, the fresh muzak kicked in and was loud as hell. "GOOD GOLLY MISS MOLLY!" It was so obnoxiously loud that I started laughing and stopped as Bert admired a Power Ranger. For some reason, Little Richard got me grooving and even though there was no Nunzio, I started clapping to the beat.

"Bert. This would be a great song to strut to," I said as I did my best Ric Flair impersonation.

Bert started laughing and did it with me. I thought of a Jive Dance that I saw on "Dancing With The Stars" and added a little flavor to it and we laughed so hard and continued to do the "Kmart Strut" all the way to the front of the store until the music stopped. We even did it in the parking lot. A new dance had been born.

Nunziomania. Four hours later we had hit two Targets, two Walmarts, two Kay Bee Toy stores and a Toys 'R Us and still... NO NUNZIO.... However, the Kmart Strut was well alive and continued to live in every store we stopped in.

We even called the oldies station like four times and bitched out the DJ "Dick Barclay" for refusing to play Good Golly on our request. (Barclay said he was spinning for a 60's show and that Little Richard was clearly a 50's artist.) Barclay said he would play some Beau Brummels instead for us. What a nutsack.

Our Nunzio Trek ended at a Walmart quite near our house. Still NO NUNZIO, but they did have a Joey Mercury and Johnny Nitro two pack. I bought it and Kmart Strutted out the store.

Stay tuned Kenny Casanova fans... The Kmart Strut is coming to a show near you! (And if anyone can find me a friggin Nunzio... email me!)

Website Update

2006-01-31T11:56:20Z

KennyCasanova.com

I just changed the look of the site and added a new story on there to boot!

WORD!

Piledriver Wrestling Results

2006-01-29T13:53:29Z

PILEDRIVER PRO RESULTS
Another sweet show Saturday, Nov 26, 2005. This time at Garden State Exhibit Center at: www.gsec.com, Piledriver hosted an action packed show with Rhino, Vader, Kamala, King Harley Race, Sandman, Crowbar, New Age Outlawz: Road Dogg and Billy Gunn.

Our hero Kenny Casanova took on the contract of "The Man-thing" Leatherface and put "The Ugandan Giant" Kamala to the test. However, due to the mean and nasty cheating ways of fellow manager Kim Chee, Kenny Casanova and Ole Leather were robbed of the victory!

In another match, Thornn took on Leslie Leatherman. Kenny here was robbed.

And in yet another match, Thornn took on VADER! and was robbed a third time.

Guess it just wasn't Kenny's night, but it sure was the fans. Despite a late car full of wrestlers, the fans thoroughly got their money's worth on this super name-packed show. The highlight of the evening was "Stump the Sandman" ... that is right... A trivia contest for Piledriver Pro Gear where fans asked The Sandman wrestling trivia and fortunately for them - he knows very little wrestling trivia.

Some shots at show...
kenharley.jpg      kenmanthing.jpg     kenroaddog.jpg     KCRoadDogg2.jpg   KCkamala2.jpg     KCRhino.jpg     KCVader.jpg    kCsandman.jpg Thornnnmanthing.jpg    thornnmidgets.jpg thornnroaddogg.jpg
ThornnVader.jpg

Visit the venue's web site www.piledriverpro.com for more info
or join the mailing list at: info@piledriverpro.com

Joe Rules... Gary Hart's Love Child!

2006-01-29T13:49:20Z

Gary Hart, a manager extensively known from his main-stays at World Class Championship Wrestling and NWA, first really made the rounds as a wrestler in the Wisconsin, Illinois area in the early '60s. Ironically enough, this is when Joe Rules mother, Mama Rules was visiting a cheese plant on vacation. Witnesses say that it also was right about the time that she first got into wrestling as a fan -and she first laid eyes on what many people believe was to be her future sweet-"HART."

In the 70's, Mama Rules, along with her penchant for strong cheeses, enjoyed grueling matches with the likes of The Missing Link, Bruiser Brody and other evil, "dirty and smelly" wrestlers like Abdulla The Butcher. Many say it was only a matter of time before she alligned herself with manager Gary Hart, in order to get free poloroids and chachki's from her favorite foul grapplers.

Gary Hart does in deed have a son, Chad Hart, who now wrestles and has made Gary Hart proud. However, with the anti-impressive jobberistic Joe Rules win-loss record, many believe that Joe Rules is actually Hart's illegitimate love-child of whom Hart wished would just go away. My sources say that Gary Hart has hidden this information for some 30 years now because being a true Texan at heart, Gary Hart did not want fans to know that he would have stooped so low as to have had an affair and sleep with ANYONE from New Jersey.

Critics can easily make comparisons. Gary Hart, believe it or not, was a bleach-blonde "nature boy" type as a wrestler in the mid-60s known as "Gay" Gary Hart. Gary Hart is best remembered for his heel-manager roll in promotions like World Class Championship Wrestling. Joe Rules is a manager for JWA and many fans and fellow workers say that "Joe Rules is just gay."

At this time, Joe Rules has been unavailable for comment. We at Kenny Casanova dot com asked Joe Rule's main squeeze Nicole Taylor if he would consider taking a blood test to end the rumors. She in turn asked "what site is this for?" and then held the phone up to her ass and farted in our ears over the speakerphone. It is obvious... Either Nicole Taylor doesn't like our site, or is truly trying to hide something.

While a paternity test has not been completed at this time, we believe that it is not because Joe Rules does not want to align himself with this arguably detestable manager. We rather believe that Joe is too cheap to pay for a paternity test and will not go on Maury to get a free one, due to his loyalty to the Jerry Springer show.

At press time, Kenny Casanova, being the ladies man that he is, has been asked to try and swoon over Mama Rules in a feeble attempt to find the truth. His secret weapon - karaoke and hot wings - may be the only way the world will ever know. We will keep you posted.... -EAD

__________________________________________

MACBRE

2005-10-10T15:51:44Z

Ever have one of those movie-like quality dreams? One that felt really real? Everything is exactly like it is in real life. No distortions.

Last night I had a dream that was probably one of the most real feeling dream I have ever had. It started with a stalker, a serial killer, who was hiding right near my house.

It opened with me walking my dog just as I do most nights. When I do this, I often check my cell phone for messages. I did so in the dream as usual. On this night, I started getting some kind of weird text messages. I don't use this feature on my phone so I was a bit confused.

Anyhow, this is when a voice told me he was a stalker, but I don;t really need to be afraid yet because "out of 60 people, he had killed 43." He wasn't sure if he was going to kill me or not yet. The route I walk my dog in was exactly the same as in the dream and I passed this one clearing I always do. In the dream, I looked over in the tall grass and I saw this figure on a cellphone.

Funny thing was, I wasn't really scared at all. I remember thinking - "this guy doesn't know who he is messing with - if he tries to mess with me, I will just do some UFC crap I saw on Spike TV and he will be toast." Believe it or not, I seriously thought of that as a defense.

I kept walking and eventually I returned to my house and my for some reason, my sisters were all there hanging out. They have done this in the past, however it is not really a normal thing. I guess for a conflict with a murderer, my mind had to have others around to make things more dramatic. So.. I told them about the guy and they all laughed. Then I got the knock on the door.

The figure was standing outside the door window, the same as anyone does in my house and I could see him. He had like some kind of blue gas thing he was about to use, or some kind of explosive on the porch. I think it was to break down the door, but I don't know. I quickly reached into my hutch and grabbed the first weapon I could find; scissors -kept exactly where I keep them in real life -in this little wicker basket. I figured I had to kill him or be killed.

I opened the door and lunged at him. I drove the scissors into his neck and he stumbled a bit. So to put the final nail into the coffin, I stuck them in and started cutting away -like you do to paper.. but in this case neck cords and all. Opening and closing. It was ill.

Just like any other lame b-movie. I turned around to call the cops. After doing so, the body was gone

Why are there so many lame indies? RANT

2005-10-04T20:16:11Z

This isn't me being bitter. Just trying to figure out what happened. When I first started, most workers got 50-$100 no matter who they were. There was a time when wrestlers got paid. I saw it. Now... very few mid carders get much of anything for their time, except the satisfaction of another match under their belt. How did it get this way? And does it matter? In the whole scheme of things, excpet for some exceptions to the rule, I think this is why indies as a whole are not as good as they once were.

Right now, and for a good few years now, there is NO money in indy wrestling. WWE is starting to understand this and acting likewise (i.e. their new contracts and pay cuts).

Wrestlers used to get paid first and foremost, but the attitude has changed. The nature of the beast today is that any money made is usually now "needed" elsewhere by the promoter -and I am not even talking about the dirty promoter trying to rip off the wrestlers. The small amount of ticket money barely covers advertising fees. I have watched the way indies work for over ten years now, and it has really taken a turn for the worse. However, I think it could be fixed with a change in mindset.

Seeing that currently there is an over abundance of indy wrestlers (male), promoters can get away without paying most of them -so they don't. When they look at the whole financial budgeting scheme of putting together a show, why bring in a pretty good worker, when they can put three ok local students on for free?

The really bad part about this practice is that when a promoter is trying to save money by skimping out on talent, this directly affects the show's look overall.

Think like a fan. After seeing a few sub-par matches, less fans will want to go to the next show, instead of telling their friends to come with them. This is why many indies don't grow, they slowly fade away.

This "no pay" practice saves money for the moment, but it brings in less tickets in the long run. This practice has created a cycle in which the promoter can't afford to pay talent -because there is less money overall.

Around 1996 0r 1997, "pay days" for the wrestlers really began to drop off. Everyone saw Stone COld or the nWo and wanted to be them. Indies were flooded with knock-off nWo's and beer swilling rattlesnakes. Wrestling got really big and too many people wanted to become talent, which made the market for wrestlers piss poor. Just like anything else, when there is a surplus, the price drops. Wrestlers had to start working for less or nothing at all if they wanted to keep doing what they loved.

So how can we fix this? Today, promoters need to be more selective to make indy wrestling a good product again. Promoters being OVERLY selective will make the show better and subsequently make more $$$ for themselves as well as the good wrestlers who bust their asses on the show.

Which leads me to the girls (I manage a few)... Girls can still make a bit more $$$ than the boys, because there are less of them out there. But, for the most part, promoters don't want to pay ANY talent anymore, because they don't have to. A lot of the women workers are now seeing that they are being tossed into the same boat as the guys.

The real testament to having a passion for wrestling of late has been birthed out of a combination of the increase in fuel prices along with promoters not having the money to pay wrestlers, due to the surplus of wrestlers out there.

I have hoped for sometime that the lack of pay would weed out the "bad" talent that promoters have to pick from to fill out their cards -which further feeds the cycle. However, NO ONE SEEMS TO QUIT and there are too many schools cranking out crappy workers.

After some hard thinking about this and discussions with others on the circuit, I strongly believe that it is really up to the promoters to fix this by being selective.

A lot of people use the term "in the wrestling business" ... but I refuse to. By definition, a "business" is something that makes money. However, many current promoters don't make good "business" decisions.

No don't get me wrong. There are exceptions to this rule. I did a show last month that was the first on in a long time where EVERYONE busted there asses and everyone looked like a wrestler. There wasn't one worker wearing a crappy t-shirt and shorts, because he didn't own tights. There wasn't one guy wearing nikeys with pads over them because he didn't own boots. THIS DID NOT HAPPEN BY MISTAKE. The promoter chose to pick only the very best.

SELECTIVENESS is key! I really believe this is the only way to fix it. And once it is fixed, maybe one day we won't have to discuss whether it is fair or not for a worker to have to drive miles for nothing, eating tuna out of a can - because they could get paid for all their hard work - just like in any other job.

Ouch. My wrist!

2005-10-03T04:00:04Z

Ok - today was like a very nonproductive day. I don't think I have EVER blogged twice in a day... EVER. Aside from beating my buddy marty at hardcore uno for the 7th time in a row, I pretty much have no life.

For those of you who don't know, me and the little woman have been working on and off in my attic to create a MASTER BEDROOM. This would be fine and dandy, but I know absolutely nothing about home improvements. With that said, what do I do? I decide to drywall and tape the entire place after I put in the new floor. And for those of you who don't know anything about home improvements either, taping drywall is the hardest thing in the world to do. -Even hard up carpenters don't want to do the job.

To make a long story short: my wrist is now killing me. Two weeks ago I taped the whole ceiling and had to hold and use my hand in a way that I have never had to do. The weird angle trashed my wrist. I am a big baby! It sucks!

Karaoke DJ

2005-10-02T13:38:59Z

For some of you who don't already know - my wrestling character personna of a real bad karaoke singer evolved into getting me gigged with the sound guy as a REAL KARAOKE DJ. It started with a cheesy party we did for a friend. That and I was also looking at buying more karaoke songs so I could sing them live - and ran into an awesome collection that I had to buy. To pay it all off, we had to play out.

This can be a really fun gig for me. Sometimes I jump up and sing something weird to freak everybody out and break the ice. People get a kick out of it, because I the Kenny Casanova wrestling character comes out-which is something that you don't regularly see in the real world. (The only difference is I am not wearing the over-the-top weird clothing).

Anyhow, it can also be a little hard. When I am not doing my regular bar gig at Valentis (a super cool bar in Troy, NY) servicing semi-drunk college students up 15,000 tracks to sing from... Sometimes I do parties. Parties are tought because they always want you to stay longer. WAY WAY longer! LOL. At some point you have to say - "ok - I REALLY got to go!" -with the biggest smile I can make.

I guess it is nice to feel wanted, but you feel like the bad guy when you close up shop.

The good part is about parties is they feed you and bring you drinks. Last night, some guy gave me more BBQ ribs (my favorite food in the whole world) and I almost couldn't eat them all. ...I said ALMOST.

karaokeDJservice.com

Joke on Bert

2005-09-20T00:46:29Z

Dan scroady, bert and I were watching PPV and bert went out to smoke a cig. While he was out, I took his last one which was sitting on the table and ran to Dan's kitchen. I said do you have any toothpicks. He told me where and I took a tooth pick and he watched in amazement. I cleaned a wad of tobacco out of the paper and I then poured black pepper in its place. Dan was rolling. I then capped he cig off with some tobacco and it looked as good as new. Just as he came back in, I had set the cig back into place.

Later on we dared Bert to to try and drag the cigarette in one shot. He said he has never tried and didn't know if he could or not. He wen to the porch and hung in the doorway upon our request and tried at the door.

He took a puff and nothing. We said come on a long one! He complied. After the long first drag he said, "it isnt so bad." We were bummed thinking the pepper went undetected. We dared him to finish the cig in a second long drag. The second puff came and his eyes welled up immediately. Bert got the pepper in his throat and he ran out into the middle of the the street in front of dans house screaming. He threw his hand way up high holding the cigarette above his head then slammed it down to the pavement hard. He rubbed it out with his shoe to the tar and started spitting like an al pacca llama.

When he came back in, he said " I will never super drag a cigarette again." He said it was hotter than eating 100 peppers and didnt know that I had messed with it until we told him. He hit his knee hard.

some stuff...

2005-08-24T17:44:41Z

I did a private party Karaoke DJ gig the other day. It was outside. I was rather surprised that i could do it so well in the dark. The only thing that really sucked was getting eaten alive by misquitos.

Like Shelton Benjamin says, "there ain't no stopping me now!"
I got the official letter... I got tenure! Whooo - hooo!

Would U hit that?

2005-08-14T12:49:28Z

Did anyone ever notice that in the movie GREASE Rizzo looks like she is 40 years old? Gimmie a break. A high school student? She looks more like a lunch lady than a Pink Lady.

I guess I would still hit it.

k9casanova @ 2005-08-12T20:10:00

2005-08-13T00:11:52Z

Quick movie review .... Thus far this summer, aside from the now already passe Star Wars: Episode 3 (which I think was REALLY good, but didn't feel like Star Wars) I have seen Deuce Bigelow: European Gigolo and Four Brothers starring Marky Mark Walberg.

& FOUR BROTHERS AND DEUCE 2

These two movies are totally different but both in my opinion are great.

DEUCE BIGELOW: EUROPEAN GIGOLO
If you want a comedy with some sick jokes and overall, just wanna laugh your pants off - go see Rob Shneider in Deuce 2 (is that redundant?)... It is loaded with freaks and messed up stuff that made these three fat black sisters in front of me vomit popcorn chunks into their laps out of hysteria. One memorable thing the gigolo taught me from the movie was a new sexual position called "The Portugese Breakfast" which involves a latino woman and a raw egg. If the black girls liked it - you will too.

NOW... Perhaps the sleeper of the summer...

Four Brothers - is totally kick ass.
If you want to laugh and see people get killed by Marky Mark, this is definitely a must see for you. The premise is simple; four delinquent brothers raised by a great woman them return to their old neighborhood all grown up - to avenge their mother's killer. The four brothers consist of two black dudes and two crackers. Team up Mark Wahlberg with sexy stud muffin (whole grain) Tyrese, Garrett "I wanna be a head banger" Hedlund and Andre 3000 -who really shakes it like a poloraid picture and you have got yourself one splendid picture in the making.

This picture by far surpassed my expectations. Marky has some great and memorable one liners and when vengeance comes, the crowd does not leave unpleased. Lots of action, great characterization and twisty endings say it is sweet.

GOT HIS GOAT

2005-08-04T02:31:47Z

So anyhow - Buttery Bert's gimmick evolution came out of a poor man's imersonation of KoKo B Ware doing Booker T's Hungryman Swanson Backyard BBQ TV Dinner commercial... To make a long story short, I kept calling people, Bert one of them, and yelling out what Booker T would say in his commercial -but in Koko B Ware's voice. "A whole pound of Chicken... Ribs... and Buttery Mashed Potatooooes!" Yeah that's right. Just like Koko would have done it in his sing-song promo voice.

So we are now telling Joe Rules and Rick Silver that in order to book us, that aside from the bucket of KFC and gas money (in nothing but RHode Island mint US quarters) they need to go and get a goat from a local petting zoo so Bert can bring it to the ring on a leash.

Your thoughts?

GENERAL GRIEVOUS HAS A POSSE

2005-08-04T02:25:31Z

When Scroady dragged me along to his mecca... met this welfare slapper at star wars convention he was like an old school storm trooper rapper
with a ghetto blaster. The dude would set it down and break dance in the autograph lines. It was the lamest crap I ever saw. I LOVED IT~!

Here is his site www.suckadelic.com. I dont really get his site, or what it is - but he should definately consider wrestling.

lol

SNEAKERS

2005-07-31T14:20:50Z

Man... I must have some weird sized feet. I can NEVER just walk into a store, buy cool running shoes and walk out. It is always a big ordeal. I am never satisfied and return what I get the next day or whatever. Like the past six months for example... I have been trying on all kinds of stuff, never buying anything. Now just the other day, I bought these really expensive black running shoes called Nike Air Max TL. They felt pretty good in the store and I thought I was finally done. But a day later I returned them twice for different sizes.

I really liked these Nike Bohemian black running shoes, but they stopped making them of course.

A lot of new sneakers look like CLOWN shoes. (Now a large part of my wrestling attire looks like clown crap, so every so often I want a second to step away from the wild side.) I just want something that feels good, is a black running shoe with a nice arch and is rather plain looking.

Me freaks... Hollas if you's hear me. Ug ug ug ug!

2005-07-29T03:31:50Z

Again, sometimes

I get bored.